There was loss,
And it was sad,
Sad to lose your only form of social support.
Sad to stand by the sidelines and watch her carry on,
As if nothing had happened,
And sad to see her replenish her stocks,
To improve the quality of her life,
To observe but not be able to share in any of the gifts Allah had granted her.
Humans are flawed,
Humans have knowledge,
Humans can preach,
But they don’t always practice what they preach,
And it is sad to see those you care about,
Look upto and admire,
Just drop you as it was inconvenient for them,
To have you around.
They talked about mutual respect,
They told me they thought I was good,
But yet treated me like I was insignificant.
Well…I have thought about this,
And yes, it hurts but…
They can fill their scale of deeds with whatever they choose,
Right now as a believer I feel –
How should I react to this?
And that is with beautiful patience 🙂
To turn to Allah,
Complain to Him,
Cry my eyes out to Him,
For all the pain I have endured,
And continue to endure.
For the triggers,
For the difficult/challenging thoughts which emerge from it,
And the generally rubbish feelings.
It’s just all a bit too overwhelming.
And my head struggles to contain it all.