The last few days have been filled,
With resting, edible delights and bliss.
I am grateful that Allah has granted me,
The means to sit back and relax,
While the entire world comes to me.
I have money in my account,
And a roof above my head,
And an endless array of possibilities,
That lie in the future ahead.
Oh how sad I’ve been,
Throughout this past year.
But I’m finally acknowledging my feelings,
And being kind to myself.
I’m not forcing myself to work,
Or trying to stick to a fixed routine.
I’m just waking up and kinda just going with the flow.
I’m lying in bed reading things,
And spending time with myself.
I’m dreaming and imagining the future,
And praying to Allah that He grants me all that I desire.
I get up to eat or watch something on tv,
And then might do a little bit of work on the side.
I’m not going to force my body to do something it doesn’t really require.
It’s true, our body has needs,
Our feelings are important,
And they need time,
Not pushed out of the way.
We’re all human,
And we hurt each other in different ways.
We’re not always aware of it,
But I’d rather become more self-aware.
So then I can hold myself to account,
And turn to Allah to repent,
Whilst acknowledging my weaknesses and flaws.
I’m not trying to fake it anymore,
As Allah mighty well knows,
The ill feelings, thoughts and desires,
That I hide inside my heart.
There’s no point denying them,
As they won’t really go away.
They’ll lurk beneath the surface,
And influence my every move.
But maybe if I acknowledged they were there,
Then perhaps I would be more in control,
And I wouldn’t let those feelings or urges,
Make me turn to things I should avoid.
Instead I should keep my soul in check,
And keep watch of what goes on within,
So that I can steer it in the direction,
Of Allah and what our beautiful Prophet did.