What this Break-Up Taught Me

I wanted to write a post on what I deem to be the positives about this break-up as nothing in life is all doom and gloom. Allah says in the Qur’an that “with hardship comes ease”. Another translation for that verse is “after hardship comes ease” but regardless of whichever translation you accept, Allah is telling us that ease is close to hardship. 

  1. It has taught me not to emotionally depend on other human beings. I should try to figure things out for myself. If there are means such as counselling/support available, then I could try that out (which may or may not be useful). But the key to realise here is that all good comes from Allah so I need to depend on Him first and foremost.
  2. I need to keep a balanced social life where I am interacting with lots of different types of people. This is good for my own personal development. Also, it enables me to spread dawah and teach other Muslim sisters things. It will also mean that I am not overloading one person with my emotional problems as it is not good for them.
  3. It has shown me that things in life are transient. Allah gives us good things and then He takes them away. It can almost seem random at times and it won’t make sense to us. Perhaps it doesn’t need to make sense. People will die all the time, sometimes in quite horrific or unexpected ways. We can’t explain everything in life. It’s just the way things are sometimes.

I want to carve a better future inshaAllah. I am looking forward to change in some ways. Yes, things will be uncertain and might be scary/challenging at times, but I’m a little excited too. I devoted so much of my time and attention to this friend when there’s a beautiful world out there to explore and I want to do that inshaAllah.

I do sometimes cry about it and I sometimes feel nervous about seeing her. But I think I have gained some type of closure. There are unanswered questions. There are things she said about me which she does not want to clarify. She says she can’t handle talking about emotional things. I couldn’t handle uncertainty. So as you can see, it is difficult to strike a balance between the two. 

But I feel relieved now. It is all over. I have no desire or wish to bring things up again inshaAllah and I hope Allah keeps it that way because my friend clearly can’t handle it. 

She says we shouldn’t forcefully regrow the friendship that existed before and perhaps she is right. I’m willing to just let the road take its natural course inshaAllah. Allah knows where it will lead 🙂

Alhamdulillah for everything


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