She hasn’t replied yet. It’s ok, I’m open to the idea of her not getting back to me. Whatever! I don’t want to waste my thinking space on her. I can start afresh socially inshaAllah. It takes time to develop some strong social networks when you are surrounded by new people again, but Alhamdulillah, things have been improving. I’m chatting to my friends more. Yes, there were so many questions in my mind about what happened and why, but this isn’t the first break-up to happen in the history of break-ups. I see now why it is so heartbreaking. But people move on and they find new things/people to love.
I’ve also started talking to a friend of mine about this. Something similar happened to her and I know it really affected her emotionally. I didn’t want to talk to my friends about this at first cos most of my close friends know her and I did not want to backbite her but I had to remind myself that sometimes backbiting is permissible, like when trying to get advice or seek a resolution to the problem.
I’ve had my say but I want to move on now. I guess it’s hard though because we’re in the same year group so still have to be exposed to each other for a while.
Things have been getting better little by little and life will never be free of hardship and pain, I accept that. Allah will heal these wounds and grant me things that are better. Ameen. I’ve been making d’ua for those things and I need to continue doing so.