I sometimes wonder if I’m depressed at the moment? If I am, then it is a mild level of depression because I am able to function Alhamdulillah.
So which of the signs and symptoms do I have?
- Feeling low – I do feel low about where I am in life.
- Lacking energy – this is my main symptom. I feel excessively tired all the time. I’m having to sleep a lot and feel like I have to drag myself along on placement.
- Struggling to concentrate – when people talk to me or when I am observing something, there is a lot of mind chatter going on in my head. But I’ve always been like this for as long as I can remember.
- My appetite is very suppressed at the moment. I don’t feel as hungry and can’t eat as much.
- I have lost a little bit of interest in my studies – but maybe that is due to the fact that I am repeating the year and am covering material I learnt before so learning isn’t as interesting as it was before.
- Lacking self esteem? – Hmm, not sure about this one. Maybe a little? I’m trying to teach myself that my self esteem should come from islam though. So that I can have nothing in life, but islam should be able to suffice me.
- Guilty? – Maybe a little bit for putting my friend through pain. But I am coming to forgive myself and I feel much less guilty than I did in the previous weeks, Alhamdulillah.
I do not have the following symptoms:
- Psychomotor retardation – slowing down so people can notice a change
- Loss of enjoyment – I can still enjoy myself when I’m with my friends/family.
- Suicidal thoughts – I still want to live Alhamdulillah. I still have ambitions 🙂
- Hopelessness – I do believe that there is the ability to get and be better. Allah allowed me to recover before.
So that is just a little medical analysis of my mind in light of the ICD-10 criteria for depression. It is in no way the complete picture but it’s just a way of considering my life and what I would like to alter inshaAllah.