I feel like I’m carrying the dead weight of bitterness and resentment inside me towards this friend of mine.
Thoughts like the following are going through my mind:
“How could she abandon me when I was at such a low point?”
But then as I write and look at the above statement, I feel a little bit sorry for her, for having to carry the burden of my emotional troubles for so long.
I guess this is it. This is the time for me to learn to depend on no-one expect Allah. It is tough and so easy to blame my circumstances and the people around me for the predicaments in my life, but I know these thoughts are from the shaytan. He wants me to hate these other believers and so I should not distance myself too much from those who Allah loves the most.
I must challenge these thoughts of mine! I really want to forgive my friend but currently I just can’t. I want to let go but I don’t know how to. I think about this all day long when I should/could be doing things that are way more productive and important.
Shaytan tries to drive apart the believers so we are disunited. I will not allow him to do so and create a wedge between me and what is good in my life.
I don’t want to have any regrets on the day of judgement about how I treated others. I WILL let go of this bitterness inshaAllah. I WILL love and respect all of the muslimahs that Allah sends into my life. We are a team and we will make it together, inshaAllah.